Okay, okay, I promised you a contest and a contest you shall have. It is, as I also promised, pretty much the height of lameness, but oh well. To set the stage:
Viera, a woman of questionable virtue and not inconsiderable sexual appetites walks into a seedy tavern. She spots alone at the bar a man of ambiguous age and appealing face, who appears *ahem* limber enough to sate even a woman such as she. Without delay, she moves in for the kill, only to have a tavern girl take her aside and sympathetically inform her the man, Aru, is nearly 1200 years old, and has been celibate for two thirds of those years, loyal to the wife he can never see again.
Viera shrugs and thanks the girl. But alas, Aru's inconvenient devotion to his wife has only piqued her interest in him. With narrowed eyes and a predator's smile, she sidles up to him, leans close so her lips are right next to his ear, and whispers...
You tell me. What line could she possibly use that will lure Aru to her bed? Do your best. Do your worst. Sexiest, cheesiest, wordiest, whatever. Give me pick-up lines, give me lots of them and give 'em to me by noonish [ETA: deadline extended to midnight pacific] on Monday the 18th. Winners get a free ebook, either Crossing Swords or Healer's Touch, whichever you prefer.
I'll pick my favorites and name the lucky few Monday night.