Saturday, February 14, 2009

Romance and Valentine's Day

I've always been kind of indifferent to Valentine's Day. Part of it is my general lack of sentimentality for "special" days--especially those arbitrated by the greeting card and floral industries. Part stems from a (now ended) 15-year marriage to a man with similar deficiencies regarding overt demontrations of romantic feeling, which enabled me in my continuing ambivalence toward the hearts/flowers/candy trappings of V-day. To me, Valentine's day means little more than a busier-than-usual night at work. Simply put, I'm just not a member of the day's target demographic.


Don't get me wrong. I have a strong romantic streak. I do write romance, after all (even if there is a surplus of hot sexx0ring in it). Even way back when I was writing straight fantasy, my characters had a habit of falling hard for one another and I was all too happy to oblige them. But romance, to me, is less about dinner under candlelight, slow dancing (unless you're talking the horizontal variety, heh) and a dozen red roses, than it is about simply being with someone you love. Snuggles on the couch while watching a good action movie (I don't really do rom-com, either, lol), a pair of arms surrounding you while you stand at the sink washing dishes, a kiss when you need it, or even when you don't. If you don't have those things, no amount of flowers and heart-shaped chocolates once a year is ever going to make up for them.


I'll be spending this Valentine's Day without anyone special to share it with. That's cool, though. As I told my buddy Leah, my heart has everything it needs right now--kids, friends, family and a general happiness with my life and the person I've become. There's no shortage of love in my life, even if the romantic side of things is currently on pause.


I hope you all have a great Valentine's Day, whether you adore the assorted accouterments of the day, or are indifferent to them. Whether you're one half of a couple or in between relationships or a confirmed single. Love is love, and chocolates--even ones that aren't heart-shaped--still taste pretty darn good.


And for all of you who could use a laugh, I stole this from JenB's blog:



Happy V-Day! *mwah!*

8 comments:

sylvia said...

You mean romance isn't hot sexx0ring? Damn, I think I've been doing it wrong.

*mwah* right back at you ;)

Amy C said...

I agree with you. Me and my man don't and have never gotten into the commercialized aspect of Valentine's day. We go out to dinner, but I find any excuse to not have to cook!

Ahh, arms circling while washing dishes is one of my favorite things my hubby does when he does it. I don't know why I like that so much, but I do :).

Hugs to you, Kirsten :)

kirsten saell said...

Hey, Sylvia! Heh, romance and hot sexx0ring definitely do go together, but I figured I'd been using the "don't look, mom" tag a little too often these days, and felt it best to keep things PG13 today, LOL.

Of course, the "Peggy is a whore" thing probably spoiled that. ;)

kirsten saell said...

Yeah, Amy, there's just something comforting yet hot and sexy about those arms around you while your hands are in the soapy water. Don't know what it is, but DAMN.

*smooches*

MB (Leah) said...

Well, you know I'm with you on all of that. Today I'm really sick and have spent most of the day in bed feeling miserable, and DH has fallen asleep on the couch. That's our Valentine's Day, and it's just fine for me.

That fact that he comes and hugs me even though I'm sick, with a snotty, runny nose, and raspy cough and he could catch it himself, is all the expression of love I need.

kirsten saell said...

Aww, what a sweetheart, Leah.

It's like I always say: You know it's true love when he'll hold your hair while you barf...

MB (Leah) said...

You know it's true love when he'll hold your hair while you barf...

This is what I love about you, you're so poetic! :D

Word veri: Gedopin

laughingwolf said...

back atcha, k...

and i agree with your centremints, if it ain't an everyday thing, who cares about the designated day crap?

love the card, btw ;) lol